Sunday 4 September 2011

Looking through a single eye

Last week was wonderful being spent in the friendliest of places, Cornwall.

The return to Wiltshire has been a return to reality, to sullen, sulky and darn right rude people. I have to say that the native people of West Wiltshire are by far the most insular, arrogant and generally most self righteous group that I have ever met. Not everyone is like that and there are some truly decent people amongst the plethora of bottom feeders but the overall the impression is a negative one.

Now I am generally open minded about most things but quite frankly I have had enough.

I am convinced that there is no way that the natives of West Wiltshire are in fact human, I suspect that crop circles are real and that aliens have in fact already invaded coming down to Earth in a rural site so that no one would notice. It can be the only explanation for the way that these people are so vastly removed from any other group of people I have ever met whilst travelling this planet.

I was happily enjoying a joke with my 10 year old son to be confronted by an irate local who clearly had psychotic tendencies believing that we were laughing about him when nothing could be further than the truth. Shop assistants instead of helping you feel the need to control everything you do and should you dare to ask for something that isn't there you would think that you were asking them to remove their arms and legs.

People talk to you outside of West Wiltshire, I know it is a shock but that is the way it is, you see inside West Wiltshire you have to talk alien to be able to communicate with the natives and just like a scene from invasion of the body snatchers people will look and stare at you if you are not native.

And the really sad thing about it is that they think that this is normal. Stonehenge, well Quatermass may have been right........






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