For years I've been wondering why things are work in cycles. I think over the past few months I've worked some things out. In doing so I have come to the conclusion that I care too much.
I was once fortunate enough to spend 10 minutes alone with the great Tony Robbins, he of Shallow Hal fame for those of you who don't know who he is. In that time we chatted about life and I had just been through the most traumatic of events. At the end he said something to me that summed up my life. Live with passion!
Now I had always been a passionate person, wore my heart on my sleeve a lot, but this gave me the permission to be really passionate. So I threw myself into the most massive change programme that I had ever undergone and I reaped the benefits for many years. However in recent months I've come to discover that the passion I have for things can ultimately be your downfall for if that passion turns inwards it can be so destructive.
What do I mean?
Well if the energy that you exert outwardly towards everything that you do is forced inwardly because there are no outlets it acts like a psychological self destruct button ---- BOOM!
And that has happened to me. And like the captain of the Titanic I sailed a course that I would not change because I was passionate about reaching the prize. And like the captain of the Titanic I hit an iceberg that would ultimately lead to me sinking.
However in those cold dark waters beneath the Atlantic I had time to think and reflect. I am not a bad person who seeks destruction as some would have you believe but a good one who seeks positive change. It is how I have gone about that positive change that has led to massive assumptions about who I am and what I want by third parties. Some believe that I seek power and attention and that to get that I will destroy them. Some believe that I seek control. Some believe that I seek absolute control. Nothing could be further from the truth. This is their internal struggles and lack of self belief that drives them to think that way. However I can see how my actions in the past may have led to the paranoia. Simply put I got so passionate that I had to let everyone know I was that passionate rather than letting people find out.
I seek peace, tranquillity, higher understanding, betterment of the human psyche, love, friendship, communication, caring, travel and yet a home by the sea, activity yet quietness. I seek the best for other people and care not a jot what happens to me.
I know it all sounds corny doesn't it. It all sounds like some Utopian ideal. The truth is though that's all I want, a simple life where I can break bread and cheese on a summer afternoon and drink a glass of wine till the sun goes down and the stars come out. Where I can laugh with those I love, cry with those who are in pain and wipe away the tears of those who feel that they are broken whilst I mend them. I want to watch my grandchildren run around my feet and hear the laughter that seems so distant.
And at the end of it all can you care too much? No I don't think you can, because if you do not care then you have no soul and if you close the door on passion then you close the door on life. Just remember to keep the door open, even if only just ajar because one day, maybe not tomorrow or the next, you may find that if you don't it will all implode upon you.
Peace and Happiness everyone.
No comments:
Post a Comment